Scare-Jo

 What the eff, L’oreal? What are you doing to Scar Jo? She’s a perfectly pretty girl. So what if she bears slightly scary, less butchy resemblance to Jackie from Bravo’s Work Out, she is cute. Boring, totes, but cute. Big titty monster, sure, but cute.

But seriously, do you have a v for vendetta against her that you are making her look like butt hole in all your ads?

30-Second Dance Break!

Oh man. Yeah. Uuuuuuh. Feel it! I’m dancing. Wait, I’m dancing! To what? To a commercial? No way! This song is funtastic! I can’t stop moving! But… But…

WHAT IS THAT SONG?

I know we all hate it. First the shame that we’re dancing around the room to a song from a commercial, second that we can’t garner what the heck the song is from the 30 seconds or less of airplay. You try to remember it as you go “bum ba da da dee booom bum. chk chack chicky boom boom” down the street. And eventually, that song flees from your mind and you move on, but you are not a whole person. No. No you are not. And that is why I AM HERE FOR YOU, PEOPLE!

I have no shame. I thoroughly enjoy the music in commercials (even if the use of older songs, primarily those by one of my favorite bands ever –ELO– ruins said song FOREVER. [Screw you JC Penny].) and because I don’t want you to be incomplete people (Mr. Potato Head people), I have decided to dedicate my life to finding out what the songs in commercials are and passing on my wisdom on to you. My dear, beloved reader. Because I heart you and I want you to dance!

In our first edition I’ll answer mail from a reader.

Dear Glennis,

There’s this song in a new Jaguar commercial (I think it’s Jaguar!! Help!) and I have no idea what the song is but I’ve got to have it. I must I must I must! The commercial is not really memorable otherwise. It’s a lot of grays and blacks and the car. I do remember that the song says, “I turn my camera on” and that’s about it.

Hope you can help me!

Sincerely,

Jag-Whart’s That Song?

I respond to you, dear reader, hoping I’ve answered your question. I believe the song from the Jaguar commercial you speak of is “I Turn My Camera On” by Spoon.

Let me continue by saying I feel a little like a fraud for finding the title of that song for you as a simple google search: “I turn my camera on lyrics” would have probably produced the same results.

So I’ll redeem myself by telling you this: The song from the old itunes commercial with the million album covers being sucked into the ipod is “Cubicle” by Rinocerose.

Are you dying to know, “what’s that song?” Email us at [andnowaword at gmail dot com] and I will do that detective work for you.