A kiss on the hand may be quite continental, but diamonds are totes my bff

 I don’t know about you all, but I keep my jewels safe in a little nook inside a floor tile beneath my toilet. But some people…it’s like they’re asking for their ice to be stolen.

“I just love having houseguests. If you need anything, just ask! Fresh towels are in the bathroom on the hook.”

 ”Great thanks, I might just hop in the shower right now. Oh, hey um….I don’t see any towels in here, just…all…of…your…diamonds.”

 ”Oh! Duhhh! Towel rack, diamond rack, I never remember what goes where anymore! Those are just my right-hand rings. They empower me as a single woman. Anyway, I think I don’t have any more towels since I spent all my money on diamonds because I’m unmarried and unsure that I’ll ever get a man to buy me one. So you can wipe yourself off with this garbage bag. Also, the hot water nozzle is cold and the cold one is hot, so test the water before you get in!”

Best friends forever!

HEADON!!!

As I stated in my other blog ages ago, the commercial for Head On is completely bizarre and a little bit brilliant.  All they did was film some lady rubbing this mystery salve on her forehead and repeat the same phrase 3 times and it’s gotten insane press in the blogosphere.  I just read about it today on Pink Is The New Blog when he referenced this article in his news links.

I have nothing else to say, I just wanted to point out that Iwastalkingaboutitfirst! ThatIwastalkingaboutitfirst!  ThatIwastalkingaboutitfirst!

Also, go to the website and check out how many freakin retailers carry this shit.  Then click on the link that says, “Dr. Newman retracts his statement regarding Headon”  Apparently this doctor was misquoted as saying something negative about one of Head On’s ingredients.  I like his “owie my head hurts” letterhead.